The Art of Elegant Insults

"Some people bring joy wherever they go; others whenever they go."

A farewell party.  My boss's parting shot at the guest of honour.  A subtle hint at what a pain he had been.  No confrontation.  Just a smile and a sting.

That sent me hunting for "The Book of Insults" by Nancy McPhee,  a corporate rage in the 80s.  Two gems of insults in disguise still stay with me:  

"His confidence outpaces his competence by a considerable margin."

"There is nothing so bad as a good man who does not know when to stop."

That brings to mind "Shankar's Weekly", a satirical publication that taught democracy to laugh.  Its cartoons were merciless on Prime Minister Jawaharlal Nehru!  Yet Nehru admired Shankar and had some of these cartoons framed.  Politicians then could laugh at themselves.  Today?

Insults are like fire.

• Cruel insults leave scars.
• Wise ones cut clean.
• Humorous ones warm a room.

The best fires don't roar; they only glow.

Who came to mind just now?

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Rethinking Role Models

“My dad.”

Everyone giggled.  Some smirked.

The teacher shook her head: “No. A role model must inspire others.”

I was downcast, my dad didn't meet the criteria.

Decades later, things started to click.

What you admire isn’t the person.  It’s the narrative, the glamour.   

Not genuineness.

Like politicians, like gurus who preach virtue but conceal vice. 

We see the myth, not the mess underneath.

And when they fall?  The betrayal feels personal, because you defended an image, not a person.

People fade.  Patterns don’t.

So, what if, instead of role models, you admired moments?

A stranger’s dedication.

A competitor’s grace under stress.

A child’s innocent curiosity.

Grab the lesson. Let go of the legend.

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Emotions: The Operating System We Can’t Reboot

Cry, if you must.

Scream, if you can't control anger.

Laugh without apology.

Who said hiding emotions makes you balanced?

Modern research identifies six core emotions.  But centuries earlier, Bharata Muni in his text Natya Shastra had described nine fundamental emotions - Navarasas:

Love | Laughter | Sorrow | 

Disgust | Wonder | Peace |

Anger | Valour | Fear | 

Emotions rarely travel alone.  Together, they create new experiences:

Joy + Trust = Love

Fear + Surprise = Awe

Happiness + Sadness = Nostalgia

And when emotions intensify:

Annoyance hardens into Rage.

Serenity surges into Ecstasy.

A deadpan face isn’t neutrality.  It’s regulation.  Sometimes, even suppression. 

Micro-expressions always manage to slip out in disguises like:

Hunched shoulders, Trembling voice, Darting eyes etc.

The face performs. The body reveals.

Be honest. Do you reveal emotions?

Or are you stage-managing them?

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